wiper

I know that my car is old. But I never felt that it's ANCIENT until last night. As we finished our weekly intercession at church last night, it was raining and a friend of mine didn't drive so I offered to take her home, I'd have to pass her house anyway. She brought her 5.5 year old son along with him. The little boy was curious about everything and while I was chatting with his mother he started asking question:

Sammy: "Tante Kristin, what is this?" (pointing at something)
Me: "Oh, this is to turn on the lamps."
Sammy: "And what is this?" (pointing at another thing)
Me: "Oh, that is to turn on the wiper... look here *click* it's on."
Sammy: "And how do you turn on the wiper in the back?"
Me: "Huh??? I don't think this car has it!"
Sammy: "But daddy's car has wiper in the back!! How come this one doesn't?"

My friend (Sammy's mom) and I laughed so hard and she told him: "Sammy, don't say something that will embarrass Tante Kristin! Daddy's car is a new car and this one is an old car, old car only has front wiper!" (their car is an Alphard). I could only say: "Yeah, sorry this old car doesn't have any wiper in the back!" But apparently that didn't stop him asking about things, which fortunately had nothing to do with the antiquity of my car.

When he hopped off the car he didn't forget to thank me for driving him home. While he was waving furiously at me as I drove away, I also didn't forget to tell him: "Hey Sammy, before you go to bed tonight please don't forget to pray to God to give me a car that has wiper in the back!" And he shout outloud: "OK!!"

After all, doesn't the Bible said that God listens to the prayer of a little kid. Who knows, maybe next year I'll be driving a car with wiper in the back. And if you read this and happens to have children, please ask them to pray for the same thing for me (^o^)

the meaning of life

Finally we entered the Year of 2010... I can't help but wondered how many more years will I have in this world. Could be not for long, but I really wish it's long enough for me to enjoy to the fullest. But I also hope I won't be there anymore when the earth ends its cycle... yeah, thanks to Global Warming hahaha

Last year's holiday wasn't long enough as I usually had it in the previous year, and compared to those other years it was an ordinary enough holidays. I didn't get to travel, only managed to get 2 days off (though fortunately Christmas & New Year fell on weekends) but I certainly enjoyed every second of it. Got to spend quality time with friends and families.

On the last day of a short trip with come close friends we went to a Dutch cemetery. Actually, it's a cemetery for Dutch & British soldiers who died in war in our country many years ago. Many are just the cross without a body buried underneath. It wasn't my first visit to the place but somehow this time it left a deep impression. When I looked at rows and rows of the ashes boxes. next to the small chapel... while reading the names and the birth & death dates, I wondered how they died. Was it instantaneously? Did they feel pain before they die? Did they have missing body parts? I couldn't help but wonder.

And of course looking at the white crosses across the green grass made me feel even sadder. Some of the crosses stated that the person died in a young age, not even 20. Maybe they died in war for something that did not believe in. Or maybe they really did die for their country. And yet the fact remain the same, they died for a reason. And for whatever reason it was, they died a hero. It is also a fact that wars are still going on in every part of the world. There will be more crosses without a body, more ashes to keep and more young lives wasted.

I'm already many years over 20... but sometimes I wonder if I really understand the meaning of life. It's one of my resolutions in entering the new year... to find more meaning of life. I'm probably not a soldier going to war, but I definitely have my own war. A war to succeed in works, a war to succeed in life. And I want to fight with faith and believe. That I'm trying my best and going all out in every battle so even when there's no tomb provided for me, somehow my life had become worth meaning. Happy New Year!!

Someone Might Remember

A little over lunchtime, and I had to go to a meeting. But just when I was about to step out of the building, it rained. So I took a taxi for the 500m ride. The ride only took less than 2 minutes.

I was singing a part of the Tohoshinki's Stand By U, just the part that I remembered when the driver asked me: "Ma'am, do you live in XXX area?" Since he mentioned the place where I live, I honestly answered: "Yes. But how do you know? Did you ever take me there before?" To which he gave out a little laugh & told me: "Because you're singing a Japanese song! And from all the people that I've had driven before, you're the only one who sang Japanese so I'd remember!"

For most people this is only a slightly funny experience. You laugh about it and then you forget about it. But for me, this is such a gentle reminder that every little action that you do, every words that you say, SOMEONE MIGHT REMEMBER. Maybe you think that you're doing something only for fun, or maybe you said some words just to lighten up the party without any intention to hurt. But SOMEONE MIGHT REMEMBER.

Another example for me, I was getting out of the church after a service and passing a granny who was walking with a crane. She was about to take the 3 little steps up to the foyer. As I was walking casually by, I stopped & reflexly held her arm so that she could take the steps more steadily. She thanked me, I gave her a smile and walked back out again. And I didn't remember this until long time later one member of the congregation came up to me and told me: "Hey, my mom said that you're a nice girl and that you've been kind to her. Thank you." I was confused because I didn't even know her mom. So I asked her who's her mom & what did I do, and she repeated the story that I just told you earlier. The granny's her mom. I didn't remember my action as something serious, but she's grateful for that little action.

And that's just one good example. What about the bad one? Ooooh, believe me, people remember more & better about bad things than the good ones!! ^^" A group of friends and I were talking & joking. As time went by, the joke became bolder and bolder until I told a friend: "Yeah, and your laugh is like a devil's laugh! You should check it out or you won't get into heaven!" Everyone laughed including that friend. But later on when we're setting up a committee for a program I was informed that she didn't want to work with me because she felt hurt with my joke. The joke was said like months ago!! BUT SHE REMEMBERED.

So next time I should think before I take actions, I should consider my words before I let them out. Because many times my little actions & words can change people's life or way of thinking. In everything I do or say SOMEONE MIGHT REMEMBER. And GOD REMEMBERS. I hope from today onwards there will be more good memories of me when people think of & remember me.

The Date

Today, October 29 2009, is my father's 71st birthday. But more than that, the date holds much more meanings for him. He always had mixed feelings about his birthday, and it always made me confuse how to react too. But back when mom was still around, it's much happier for him and much easier for us to be happy for him too. Despite his request not to celebrate, he couldn't say no to my mom since it's also their wedding anniversary. Here's what happened on his birthday in the past:

1. The day his father passed away. I always forgot the year but always remember the story. He brought hom some food to celebrate with his parents & siblings, but found out that my grandfather already passed away while reading the newspaper.
2. But then my mom decided October 29 1974 as their wedding day to erase the sadness of the memory of losing my grandfather.
3. October 29 2007, my father obtained his 8th Dan (level) in Karate. He was ecstatic for his achievement at his age. But then when he came home my mother announced to the whole family (after her last visit to the doctor) that the doctor said she didn't have to come to see him anymore. That she should spend her last moments with family, and pray for the best. I couldn't stand to see his eyes. He tried to be strong for her cause she didn't cry, but I know deep inside it crushed him. There was no celebration that year.

Last year was his 70th birthday and also his first birthday & anniversary without his soulmate. He looked so sad but I went ahead with a lunch celebration with family & friends. I didn't regret it, seeing the smile on his face, hearing his laughter when we brought him cake & singing him the birthday song, that's probably the best thing that happened to me last year. Cause at that time I could see, that he's happy and he forgot all the misfortunes in the past on his birthday.

And today, we'll be cutting the birthday cake at the hospital. His younger brother has been in a coma since last Saturday for an internal bleeding on his brain. So many people called him at home early this morning. When I'm leaving for work he told me: "I'm a bit anxious. There were so many things happened on my birthday in the past years... I hope he's not gone on this day too." I couldn't seem to find the right words to console him but I could only tell him not to think of the bad things all the time. Let's just pray & hope for the best.

Today I'm so thankful to God that I'm granted another year with my father. I don't know how many more birthdays we'll be able to celebrate, but today, I'm going to make it another day that can make him happy. And I pray that everyday is also a happy day for him as it is for me, to have him stand by me until this moment.

Happy 71st birthday Pops! I love you and God bless you!

Holiday

Today is the last day of the long Idul Fitri holiday... and you know what? I haven't been able to finish all the reading & the watching that I had planned to do before the holiday. And what would be my excuse this time? Too much to do? Not enough time? Or too short a holiday?

I thought I always told myself that holiday is no reason to be lazy... Honestly, I still woke up early in the morning like any other working days, though I went to bed a little later than usual... But I procrastinate in doing everything! And not doing it the way it should have been!

I woke up at 5am in the morning... I replayed my ipod again... closed my eyes and slept for another hour... At 6am, I turned on my side lamp & read things that I didn't plan to read... At 8 I woke up, took my time to do my bed... And by 9, I haven't even mopped the floor!

Even when I watched, I've actually made a watching list... but I ended up watching totally different movies/shows. And the worst was I fell asleep while watching/reading, and when I woke up instead of continuing it, I did something else! T____T

Anyway, even though things didn't go as planned, I'm still happy... I got the much needed sleep, time with dad, enough shopping, and definitely a whole lotta fun with some of close friends! Yeah, this time the housekeeper had decided to quit her job and I had to do the laundry (for my own clothes :p Dad washed his own hahahaha) & the much hated ironing... Thankfully my dad can cook his own food as I'm the useless one in the kitchen :p All I did was providing the raw material as requested hehehe *useless daughter*

Maybe I won't plan anything for my next holiday... maybe I should just let it roll however I like... but still, holiday is no reason to be lazy *once again* it's just another reason to take your time to to do things... Happy holiday!